A Very Vintage Valentine's Mix + From Vanilla To Red Velvet To Dark Chocolate: I'm Not Talking About Cake

Guess what peeps?

I survived the most recent apocalypse, and though it may seem like I fell head first into the Bermuda Triangle, it's not far from the truth.

I'm right on the bottom corner, in fact. And I'm finding out Island Time is a very real thing.

Today I'm hoping the old saying, "Better late than never" still applies.

Happy Valentine's to all the world's migrating Love Birds!

Here's a mix to rock with your sweetie, or while you primp and powder.

Just for good measure, I didn't leave the Valentine's Day Massacre-istas out:

Skip the last song if your fire burns for your fella', or femme fatale,

'cause the last one is reserved for the furious foes of this cuddle-icious occasion.

Got to be all inclusive, right?

                                             

Believe it or not, Valentine's Day is one of my favorite holidays,

when solo, to decimate, when enamored, to celebrate.

So trust: I am givin' myself a swift kick in the derrière for the point-blank fire of this posting.

But I just made my plans this morning, and I'm going for it anyway.

If your still searching for some last-minute inspiration,

 lock your sites on this and put on your crafty 

pants quick!

Sweets for your Sweetheart

Clare Bare Lingerie

Silver Screen Starlet Pumps @ Plasticland

Sugar & Spice Aprons

Your mama may have told ya that the way to someone's heart is through their stomach,
but if you're wearing any of the above, cooking is officially optional to get the desired results.

beehive kitchenware

Kalorik Heart Waffle Maker @ Amazon

design 3000 Cookie Set for Two

Then again, the real thing never hurts your chances of making a heartfelt impression.

Sweeteeth Port Wine Caramel Sauce 

Whip something up and revel in the smiles caused by your confectionary genius. And if you have any left over frosting, no need to make more cookies. It's uses may come in handy elsewhere ;)

 

 The Serenadora

The Heart Tenor Ukulele by Celentano Woodworks

Even if you're not a professional, these are music to the eyes and will inspire the ears to follow suit.

Heart On Your Sleeve Dress @ Modcloth

Durango Crush Taupe Heart Cut-out Cowgirl Boots by Shepler's

Da'Love-Bomb-inatrix

Thought latex was played out?

Even the biggest stars beg to differ when it comes to the cutting edge elegance of designer 

Atsuko Kudo

Fuzzy handcuffs are a different story. Unless you're trying to recreate the rave era, they are way too played out for any self-respecting fashionista, 

even outside of the public eye.

Incoqnito Handcuffs in Black and Rose Gold

Now that's more like it!!

Black leather and rose gold bring the bling to the boudoir.

These mean business.

The Valentine's Day Massacre-ista 

All the single ladies: Put yo hands up and say,"Yeah, Yeah!!"

I've had plenty of single Valentine's days,

and I wish I could link you to my fav anti-valetine's shirt by She Bible.

Unfortunately it's out of production, but it was pink, with blood splatter and an axe on it,

and on the back it read, "Kiss my Axe."

It was glorious, but back to the here and now.

This may be a worthy substitute
for sharing your thoughts.
The most popular one-liner of all time:

Ana Linares It's Me Necklace

However, if you were on the receiving end of this prize piece,
you may be in need of some R&R.
Before your revenge and retribution,
let your mind settle with a solo spa day...

What's a massacre without a bloodbath? 

Blood Bath Set from CherryBox

The perfect combination of creepy and cute is sure to put an evil sneer on your face.

You can unwind in luxury fit for a queen. Or at least one iconic antagonistic countess.

Her name was Elizabeth Bathory. Ironic or no?

And then there's the "who needs a man" category:

Hustler Disco Stick Vibe

It's not the bird, it's not plain, and it is not Lady Gaga's new microphone.
I know, that last one surprised me, too.

If your imagination doesn't take you there, don't even try to peek into the territory of this next directory.
However, if you're over it, or you're into it,
or you just wanna call my bluff, the cards are on the table.
If you pick them up, that's in your hands, not mine.
And if you're under 18, you're sitting out for this round.

For the Bourgeoisie:

Coco De Mer

For the Ladies:

Toys in Babeland

For the Curious:

The Pleasure Chest

For the "Been there, done that, try harder":

JT's Stockroom

Proceed with caution, then go get some ice cream cake.
Happy V-Day to all the Love Birds and Birds of Prey out there!
XOXO

'Zat You, Santa Claus? - A Radical Idea For Holiday Charity

Loading... cocking... BAM!
Finally, on to the next round.
Sorry to keep you ladies in waiting, but sifting through ALL one's earthly possessions is
no small order.
I'm forcing myself to chisel out a chunk of time for this next topic,
which is of dire importance, especially before Black Friday descends upon us and creates a
Zombie hoard that hungers for sales as though it were a matter of life or death!
If you are among this massive gathering of consumerists, I'm not hatin' on ya.
But, I want to put this out there before you feel a massive pull on your wallet.
Maybe I can appeal to your heartstrings and give them a tug in the other direction.

There is a much more urgent congregation of citizens that need $20 more than Uncle Elmer needs another pair of Santa Socks.

Homelessness is at an all time high in the US with the devastated economy,
and worldwide it is an issue beyond comprehension!
Among the homeless are growing numbers of Women and Children,
50% of whom are fleeing domestic abuse, and other's who have simply had their veritable
woven-fabric-of-life rug pulled out from under them. Just how urgent am I talking here?

The statistics of homelessness on a Global scale are stifling:

Shine Global - Homelessness For Children in the US

Homeless World Cup - 100 Million People Worldwide Are Homeless

Even if you didn't read these word for word, the titles alone paint a rather dismal picture.
So what can we do about it?

Here's your detour to some Charities of Choice that are helping put the pieces back together for those who are seeking them out:

These organizations focus on Families, Women and Children who have found themselves in the ultimate of unfortunate conditions. Within their sites, you can find ways to help,
from donating to volunteering:

http://barrettfoundation.org/

http://www.women-in-need.org/

http://www.nationalhomeless.org/factsheets/families.html

http://www.bfwc.org/homeless_services.php

If you've ever had a hard time being grateful for the cards you've been dealt in life,
VOLUNTEER TODAY!
I think my most valuable life lessons have been gained from
buying a homeless person a cup of coffee, and listening to their life story.
How they still have a sense of humor through all that life has thrown their way, I don't know, but some of them are the most interesting and inspiring people on the planet.
The World Cup agrees, and is a key player in fighting for the people:
Homeless World Cup

And speaking of planet, if you're feeling extra adventurous and need a true revelation,
volunteering abroad will open up your crown chakra in a whole new way.
You may have noticed these listings in my random rounds, but today they deserve a spotlight:

crossculturalsolutions.org

goabroad.com/volunteer-abroad
You will discover a whole new world, and a whole new you, in one go!

If you don't have the time to volunteer, you may also think you don't have the money.
But, you can donate anything from $5 to $50,000 dollars to most organizations.
As many have said before me, sacrifice one Starbucks, feed one who is starving.

I love this organization, because it lets you single out exactly where your money is focused, and it doesn't take much to make a big difference in someone's life:

  Seva Foundation

On the other hand, this organization let's you single out a person or family in need, but you go beyond a one time donation to helping them start a business of their own.
This goes into the "teach them how to fish" category, and can make a world of difference
around the globe. It's a gift that literally keeps on giving:


Kiva - Loans That Change Lives

There are tons of ways to contribute to those in need, as you can see above.

But, I mentioned a Radical Idea for Holiday Charity in the title.
If that caught your attention, then that's all I wanted.
While these take some guts to do,
they stay within the confines of what is safe and expected.

I had a radical idea, but as it turns out, it is too radical.
However, I can't just lead you on like that and still sleep at night,
so "Don't Try This At Home".

My idea was to hand out Santa Costumes to the Homeless.
Crazy, I know.
But I used to live in Downtown LA very near Skid Row, and as I mentioned, most of the Homeless people I've talked to have a very good sense of humor.
I was thinking, Pros:
1) They would have something warm to wear.
2) They could probably earn more money for themselves.
3) Smiles for everyone! You can't be sad while wearing a Santa suit.

And just imagine what SantaCon would be like this year!

But, eventually the Cons caught up to me:
1) I do not want to compete with the Salvation Army. They do really good work!
2) Someone is going to think this is NOT funny at all, and perhaps insulting.
(once again, this doesn't include my comrades in Downtown)
3) With the price of one Santa Costume, you could feed 10 Homeless people!

So, it doesn't fly, but it was fun to think about while it lasted.

Even still, there stands the fact that no one can help but smile at Santa.
So, if you are planning on volunteering, especially for a children's charity,
why not switch the roles around?

FunWarehouse-Pink Santa Costume

Did you smile? Yeah, ya did! 

Share those smiles, since laughter is the best medicine. It's a universal truth.

It was quite the challenge to find a Well Priced and Non-Sexy Pink Santa Suit, BTW.

So take advantage, because there is no dress code for entertaining at a soup kitchen, but I certainly would not recommend anything sexy. That would just be tasteless and humiliating, for you.

Not to mention, Rockin' the Bearded Lady look is totally in this season ;)

On that note, I'm off to the Salvation Army myself to donate three huge boxes of warm clothes and items I will not be needing for my move. I trust they will find their rightful place in the world.
Spring cleaning comes early for this chick.

While you ponder the above propositions, let Louis lighten the mood for you.
Then you can figure out where your Santa-like service would be
best suited for this Holiday season:

Still Look Like The Living Dead After The Party's Over? - Revive Your Visage With A Post-Costume Facial

Getting decked to the nines is great for one impressive evening,

but coating your face in makeup can have some unwanted repercussions 

when you awake the next morning.

If you find an unexpected ghoul in the mirror where your reflection used to be, 

your skin will be in need of a serious 

rever-upper to get your gorgeous glow back for the land of the living.

Exorcise that unhallowed spirit back to where it came from:

Makeup Removal

As obvious as this may be, you don't want to forget to thoroughly remove all

that remains of your makeup.

Plenty of spendy products are on the market, and if you have a weapon of choice,

fire away.

However, I dare you to try this:

Use your expensive makeup remover as prescribed and then

go to your kitchen.

Grab your Olive Oil and go over your face again by applying a splash to a cotton pad.

Feel a bit of a gag coming on from how much stuff was still left over?

I bet you do.

Sweet Almond and Olive Oil are the best and the cheapest ways to remove 

every unwanted particle of powder and paint.

They work wonders on removing stubborn eye makeup and mascara.

And believe it or not, even oily complexions will reap the benefits without the breakout.

Scrub a Dub Dub

For a pristine clean, you're going to have to get out the grinder.

A fine scrub that can get deep into pores will do you best.

My two favorites:

Kiehl's Re-Texturizing Micro-Dermabrasion - Natural Logic Ancient Earth Microdermabrasion Scrub

Not all microdermabrasion scrubs are created equal.

Kiehl's Micro-Dermabrasion scrub will polish your skin to a marble finish.

For sensitive skin, or Botanical Purists, Natural Logic makes a marvelous resurfacing scrub that leaves your skin feeling like velvet.

As a lover of tactile experience, there is a reason why they made my top two.

Better get something else on your face quick to keep you from 

touching it to feel how soft and supple it is.

Steam clean 

This is for devout skin care saints out there.

I don't usually have the patience, but the difference this will make is gargantuan!

Heat some water on the stove until it's steaming nicely, not boiling (you don't want burns)

Put it in a nice wide bowl on a table you can sit at,

put a towel over the bowl and put your head under the towel.

Now, remain hunched over the bowl while coughing on steam for about 10 minutes.

Can you tell I love this?

To make it a bit more pleasant, you can add essential oils of Lavender, Tea Tree, Peppermint,

or Eucalyptus. 

Lavender is calming and soothing to you and your skin,

Tea Tree is a great antibacterial, Peppermint is refreshing and improves circulation, 

and Eucalyptus opens the pores and sinuses, so grab some Kleenex.

Big ++s to steaming your face:

• It drains impurities from your pores like nothing else.
• It rehydrates your skin.
• It increases circulation and preps your skin to absorb nutrients.

Make sure your oils measure up to restoration standards. For the utmost quality:

doTerra Essential Oils

Now, let's give your skin some much needed nourishment.

Detox Mask aka Skin Rehab

My rules of thumb for a detox mask require only two things:

All Natural (you don't want to put chemicals on your face when you trying to detox it)

And Clay, Clay, Clay.

Pick the right clay for your skin type:

Rose Clay is mild kaolin clay that can be used on normal to dry skin. Gently cleanses and exfoliates.

Improves circulation.

Evan Healy French Rose Clay Mask

White Kaolin Clay is basically kaolinite and is the mildest of all clays. Use White Kaolin Clay for sensitive skin. It helps stimulate circulation, while gently exfoliating and cleansing. White Kaolin Clay does not draw oils from the skin and can be used on dry skin types.

Pure Bellezza White Clay Mask

French Green Clay is highly efficient at drawing oils and toxins from the skin. It's rich in important minerals and phyto-nutrients and is the most commonly used therapeutic clay. Use it for facials for oily skin. This clay is not recommended for dry or sensitive skin.

By Valenti Japanese Matcha and French Green Clay Mask

Yellow Kaolin Clay is mild clay for sensitive skin. It helps stimulate circulation while gently exfoliating and cleansing. Yellow Kaolin Clay does not draw oils from the skin excessively and can be used on most dry skin types. This clay is suitable for dry, sensitive, normal and combination skin types.

Pure Thoughts Banana and Yellow Clay Face Mask

When clay is wet, it penetrates the pores, latching on to imbedded gunk, 

and when it dries and shrinks back, it pulls those little nasties out with it. 

One more company of note, but a half a globe away from me:

The Australian Botanics Company

They've got'em all, and all organic!!

For more info than you ever thought you could know about clay, et voila:

www.101beautysalon.com/facemasks - shine.yahoo.com the right clay for your skin type

Rockin' this look might end up looking more frightening than the costume you wore last night.

But when it comes off, you'll be pleased with what lies beneath. Trust me!

Tone It Up!

Toner is essential everyday, but today you really gotta get your tone on!

A good toner removes any residue from cleansers and the like,

and PH balances you skin for optimum health and glow.

Stick to one that works for you if you have it, 

but suggestions will clearly follow suit:

Kiehl's Oil Free Ultra Facial Toner

Kiehl's Calandula Toner

Kiehl's has been arounf since 1851, and there's a reason for that: superior products with years of consistency. Plus all formulas are sensitive skin friendly.

Calendula soothes irritation and lessens redness in the skin. 

It's a great choice for sensitive or irritated skin.

The Oil Free Ultra Facial toner is a great basic toner for all skin types,

balancing PH and tightening the pores.

For normal, combination, or oily skin types

this organic balancing, clarifying toner

has the works!

Rich in botanicals and anti-oxidants to promote fresh, vital skin.
Deep Cleans and tones pores.
Reduces Inflammation and redness.
Heals irritation.
Improves tone, texture, and elasticity.
Natural Logic Balancing Clarifying Toner Mist

For dry and sensitive skin, this Botanical toner has the creme de la creme of luxurious and restorative nutrients:

Cucumber, Vitamin B5, Hyaluronic Acid, Helichrysum, Rosehips.

It has excellent emollient and hydrating properties.

Calming, hydrating, and nurturing.
Rich in botanical extracts and anti-oxidants.
Fights premature aging.
Improves tone, texture, and elasticity.
Natural Logic Regenerative Hydrating Toner

Toning no longer has to be so one dimensional.

These products round all the bases.

Think of them as performance enhancing drinks

for your face.

Serum

Now that you're just starting to see those lovely features resurfacing,

keep the vitamins flowing all day by applying a serum to suit your needs:

In the end, only you know what your skin is hungry for.

Observe your countenance closely to see what sustenance

it's still craving and make your choice from there.

All of the above are premier brands, I wouldn't steer ya wrong.

The great news, and one of the price-savvy tricks up my sleeve:

 They're all available at massive discount prices @ VitaCost.com

 And what ever you do, don't make your eyes jealous.
They need extra love no matter who you are.

Same applies as above: Observe, Orient, Decide, and Acquire.

All of these lovely skin-amins are also available @ VitaCost.com

I just love a good deal for a superior product, don't you?

Moisturize for the Prize

Even after you put on the serum and think your good to go, it will only go so far if you don't seal it in with a protective layer of moisturizer.

But in this application, your skin still needs to catch its breath after being smothered in powder, paint and other various costume primers.

Anything brightening or hydrating is recommended to complete the overhaul effectively.

Use what you've got in a lighter dose, or go for the gold:

Rich in vitamins with an extra brightening boost from real pearl powder (used for centuries by asian royalty), and tremella mushroom extract, this is my absolute #1 in skin replenishment and recovery.

Buy it retail for a good $50, or once again, heed my advice.

Get it for almost half the retail price: VitaCost is bomb!!